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Feeling Ostomistic
Sunday, June 17 2018

 Attention:

Calling all young females (u/55) living on the Mid North Coast or Coffs Coast with a stoma, check out this exciting and new FREE event happening in August!

My stoma nurse has been excitedly organising this event and I was honoured to have been asked to design the flyer, but I was even more honoured to be asked to speak on the night as one of the speakers.

  The event is FREE and is open to all women with a stoma and under 55 from the area, if you're willing to travel you can come along, just make sure you RSVP.

  If you have any dietry requirements aside from the stoma, let the stoma nurses know and call 0266567804, that way everyone is catered to.

  The night is going to be a fun night with the chance to get to meet other young ostomates under 55's and the hopes of connecting each other to form friendships as ostomy life can be rather lonely for some.

  There will be a fun activity for all to join in and will also have reps from different ostomy companies there with samples or to speak more. Guest speakers will include Allied health professionals as well as myself.

  This event wouldn't be at all possible without the fundraising done by the Coffs Coast Crafty Crew (scrapbookers) in April 2016, as well as the hard work from the organising team of stoma nurses.

I am really looking forward to the night, and looking forward to meeting others from the area. Whether you're from Port, Grafton or in between this event is open to anyone who would like to come, has a stoma and is under 55 and a female.

Did I mention it is FREE and catered?

Can't wait and I will see you there!

Posted by: Talya AT 11:04 pm   |  Permalink   |  0 Comments  |  Email
Monday, January 08 2018

I know there has been a lot of posts around social media this past week (well, more so New Years Day) about the whole 'non resolutions' or how people were dropping the making resolutions as they either never stick or it makes people feel overwhelmed and anxious. This has something to do with the pressure placed on how it is a "new year new me" and that you internalise this pressure for the need to change yourself.... so it gets pretty depressing when it is the end of the year and you are yet to do one thing you set out to do.

amiright?


This was a snapshot of my best memories of 2017 - read my year in review post here

Well, I know for me I get horribly depressed each December when I realise that none of my unrealistic/unattainable goals weren't met, and I feel like a bit of a failure and get pretty hard on myself.

So this year I plan on doing something a little different... I give up on each year setting myself the task of finding that million dollar idea (maybe if I don't try so hard I will find it), or to feel bad that I didn't finish my uni degree, or that I haven't got a hot bod (#sorrynotsorry).

I am choosing 18 ACHIEVABLE things I want to accomplish in 2018.

#1. Self Care:
This is something I have been gradually introducing into my life since being sick, which feels like forever, but gradually over these 5 years I have been trying to focus more on putting my own needs first and focus on me more. So in preparation of this I have been reading "The Self-Care Project" written by Jayne Hardy who is the founder and CEO of The Blurt Foundation. I love the self care subscription boxes they offer through The Blurt Foundation and was how I first learned about their company when I was researching "pick me up gifts" for issue 1 of The Ostomistic Life.

I purchased the ebook version off Amazon and by a quarter of the way into the book I was astonished, I could have sworn it was me who had written this book as it was just so incredibly relatable. It definitely has me hooked! 

Self care isn't necassarily just candle lit bubble baths with a glass of bubbly and reading a book, it can be a whole range of things. It could be doing things that make you happy, here is a post I wrote back in 2016 about 5 things to do each to add happiness or meaning to my day. You could choose to meditate or do yoga, could do a course or learn a new skill, could do something on your bucket list, could volunteer, do a random act of kindness, buy yourself flowers, get pampered, get your hair done or watch a movie or show. 

#2. To read more:
I used to be a bit of a book worm back in the day, I often would be found skipping classes just to read books in the quad. I used to be able to read so quick and loved binge-reading a series. I felt so proud when my sister loved reading as much as I used to and had quite the impressive collection.

So I have been so focussed on micro managing every part of my day/life that I would say I was too busy to read or I didn't have the time, but I vow this year to make time to read more. Whether it be the ebooks I have stored on my ipad or tablet, or going old fashioned and reading the amassed pile of books I have acculumated over the past few years. So starting with reading "The Self-care project" I am setting myself the challenge of either reading 1 book a month or 18 books this year.

Let's do this!


Just some of the books sitting on my bedside on my "to read list" (pic from Jan last year)

#3. To say No more:
I am a people pleaser, I am notorious for putting the needs of others before myself and sacrificing myself in the process. I am struggling to recognise myself and part of the reason behind doing this self care and focussing on myself is to help me try and find or recognise myself again... so part of my self care is saying no to things that will cause me stress or anxiety or bring me misery and saying yes more to things that will bring me joy. Will see how I go, because it will be one of my biggest challenges yet.

In saying this though, there will be times where I say no simply because I am physically unable to do something due to pain or health, so I am sure this will cause more stress as some might think my health is an excuse? As I said, a challenge... but I am not putting my health at risk for a ridiculous deadline anymore.

#4. Reducing waste:
I watched the ABC series "War on Waste" (also on ABC iView) and it left me feeling sad and concerned for the world in 50 years. I have seen those dystopian movies and TV shows such as 100, Travellers, The Handmaid's Tale and the like, where the world decades or hundreds of years from now is in absolute ruin due to us humans, so watching this TV series about the impact we have on the environment definitely stops you in your tracks and makes you realise the need for change.

One of my favourite quotes from Gandhi is "Be the change you wish to see in the world". Change is hard and takes patience and a lot of baby steps, but you can't expect the world to be better or changed if you don't play a part yourself. 

So I have ordered some produce reusable bags from my Sister-In Law's business which will mean no longer using single use plastic bags for produce. We also plan on using environment friendly bags in replace of plastic bags and I hope to get a compost happening too.... as I said it will be hard, but I do hope it will help the environment.

I feel guilty sometimes being an ostomate, because my base plate and bags aren't biodegradable (that I'm aware of) so even if I used bio degradable garbage bags and buried it, it still wouldn't break down and would be just the same as putting it in the bin. So I hate having a bag that leaks multiple times a day as it means a lot of ostomy products are used and thrown away, and I feel guilty that I am impacting the environment.... but it can't be helped.

So if I can make changes in other areas of my life, it hopefully makes up for it somehow?

#5. See the snow:
I went to the snow years ago and loved skiing even though I was incredibly unco and fell over far too many times because I couldn't work out how to stop quickly enough... honestly, the stories are hilarious. It was the end of September and there was hardly any snow. But something I have always dreamed of was to see the snow, like think snow failing white Christmas.

I had always hoped to get to the US or Canada and see this in person myself, but while that dream won't happen, I am happy to settle for somewhere in Australia where it snows, there is a romantic log cabin with a fire and somewhere Russ and I can unwind and relax.

I have heard him say almost daily the past month that he truly wants to experience this with me. Watching all the romantic Christmas movies helped I think, but it has had him rather upset realising too all the things he wants to experience with me but not sure if we will.

It is hard sometimes trying to squeeze 80 years of experiences into as much time as we have left.

If you have suggestions, do let me know, I can't fly so anywhere that is easily train accessible or short driving trips in NSW will be best.

#6. Learn something new:
I am still undecided on what that NEW thing is yet to be, whether it is learn a craft or skill, or more complex like learn something I have thought about for a while like learning to feel confident again, learn how to be fashionable, learn how to edit videos, learn how to podcast or learn an instrument or learn to surf. HA okay, so the latter won't happen, but you get the drift.

I am doing a course right now cert 4 in screen and media and learning at the moment how to write children's stories.

#7. Write that damn book:
I have said for as long as I can remember that I wanted to write a book, I often thought about writing a children's book which who knows could happen if I can manage to do well in my course. I'll see where my writing takes me.

#8. Write a blog post a week:
This suggestion actually came from my wonderful GP last year, he told me to write more often and if not daily to write weekly. I guess this will be post #1 for the year? If you have a question or topic you want covered do reach out and let me know.

#9. Write a journal:
It has been a while since I have written a daily journal, but my GP thinks writing daily could be good. But I never really do ANYTHING lately that is worth jotting down. But it is 8 days in to this year I have already failed at this, I was given a diary for Xmas but Russ doesn't know where it is. I know I haven't done anything too exciting yet, but my GP thinks it could be beneficial.

All of these writing cues would be kind of life self care I guess, since it is cathartic and all.

#10. Regularly meet with a counsellor:
I have spoken openly on social media and on here about my mental health issues but in case you forgot I have depression, high functioning anxiety, borderline personality disorder, self diagnosed Excoriation Disorder and I think that mostly covers it. Anyway, I have been naughty and haven't seen anyone in a while and I know I need to. I have bottled so much up that I don't know how to contain it anymore and I have complex issues I am trying to work through and it is a little overwhelming at times. I don't feel like a repeat of my breakdown in June, it took months to recover.... I just need to make time and prioritise my mental health. Russ' roster has been changing and been hard to plan ahead of time for appointments, so I am really hoping this year to try harder to prioritise this.

I guess this would come under self care and taking time for my needs too.


My swimmers kindly gifted from Yours Clothing - LOVE them

#11. Go Swimming:
I haven't been to the beach in years, I know it sounds strange since I live minutes from some of the most beautiful beaches in Australia, but it is hard when the beaches require long walks and not very accessible. It is something I miss and haven't been swimming in years, so I am hoping now that there is an accessible ramp installed at Back Creek South West Rocks that swimming could happen. I got gifted this beautiful pair of swimmers back in July that I am yet to wear swimming, so between trying to find a day where my pain is managable, where my stoma is behaving, that it lines up on a day Russ has off or that the weather was good has been tricky. Since it is school holidays everywhere is probably packed anyway, so I might wait until it is over. I don't want to spoil my first swim in years by my anxiety and fear over if I am being judged or laughed at. I am determined to make it happen - stay tuned!

Don't worry I plan on being sun safe and have my SPF50+ rashie from SunSoaked and my Sunbella parasol to help me too.

#12. Go Glamping:
I have wanted to go glamping for years, Russ loves camping but with my health issues I prefer the glamping idea. For 5 years I have had this on my bucket list, every year I say "this is the year" but something always comes up or we can't afford it. There is this place not far from here that do beach tents, it is at Red Rock (one of my fave spots) so I'd like to manage a couple of days away in March for our birthdays - since I was in hospital for Russ' I really wanted to make up for it this year. So maybe this could be when I manage my much awaited swim.

#13. Have a holiday:
This could be the past 2 cues, but it has been a while since we have had a proper holiday where the one thing on our to do list is to relax. Our last proper holiday was March 2015, was just after being in hospital for months and learning of a couple of new cancer diagnosis and I booked this place in Kingcliff for a week. I have always wanted to go back, they had the most wonderful pool and it was so relaxing. I really would like to do something this year, Russ needs a holiday.

#14. Explore the Coast:
For years we have said we wanted to see more of the coast. If only Russ could legally tow a caravan a friend offered up their brand new luxe caravan and land rover anytime we wanted it. Russ is only on his green provisionals so will be another 18 months before he can drive it, but it definitely would help make our bucket listing adventures more affordable. But until then, we hope to do day trips exploring different parts of the coast such as seeing the Jacaranda festival in Grafton, visiting Yamba and Maclean, Visiting Wooli, Laurieten and Bonny Hills, go on the ferry at Port Macquarie, Visit Foster and Tuncurry, go on a picnic to Yarrahappini and so forth.

We still have bucket listing adventures for Brisbane, Sydney, Newcastle and beyond. I am just wanting to see so much!

I am just really hoping to see/experience new places this year.


Red Rock, NSW - where we had our wedding anniversary - a favourite place of mine

#15. Renew our vows:
I really wanted to do this for our 7th wedding anniversary last year, but spent the next few months in bed with pain and didn't manage to find time to do what I had hoped... I had this epic idea I wanted to do, so I do hope to do it in pieces throughout this year and reveal my big plan.

I had always said when we get to 10 years we would renew somewhere fun and overseas, but not sure that dream of international travel is managable or if I could make it to our 10 wedding anniversary.

#16. Get back on our feet financially:
It has been really hard to feel like we aren't drowning at times in our finances. Our bank is the worst, you may recall how they no longer are letting me do my own banking because I have cancer and they believe I no longer am of sound mind - all because I asked for the 1.5% less advertised rate... so because I knew it would save us money doing so they then questioned my judgement... so I am not allowed to do my own banking unless a lawyer is present. I can't afford a lawyer so I am backed into a corner and feel trapped. It has been many months of stress and worry.

We tried to apply to several other banks who all declined us because we didn't have savings (everything went into our house) and so we had hoped to even consolidate everything into one loan to make repayments easier and more affordable but were declined. Despite having equity in the property. It is hard to have savings when every cent is going into the house, our debt, living expenses, medical expenses and the list goes on.

I am just hoping this year we have better luck and if we can't at least consolidate everything that we can find a new bank for our home loan. I just want out of their grip, just like Britain wanted out of the EU. If we can get a new bank and debt consolidation everything will be more easier, we might even afford a mini holiday.

Part of this is finding a new bank too. I just want and need everything to be tidied up and managable ready for Russ to take over when I die.

#17. See a waterfall:
I have long dreamed of seeing a waterfall. We hope to get out to Dorrigo. I know there is a beautiful one in Woolgoolga but the wheelchair isn't designed for offroad 4x4.

#18. Try to get my pain under control:

I spent the better part of last year struggling with my pain. I know my doctors are doing their best to manage it, but it really is hard and affects so many aspects of my life. It is debilitating, exhausting, it makes me frustrated and irritable, it messes with my mental health and it just sucks. It is hard to manage getting out of bed most days let alone manage an hour of getting out and about. I missed out on a lot last year and I don't want to miss out on life this year because of pain.

☟ ☟ ☟ ☟ ☟ ☟ ☟ ☟

I know it was a long post, but I thought 18 made sense since you know it is 2018 and all. I feel good that it is all written down but now overwhelmed, which is ironic, but I will do seperate posts throughout the year both here and on social media documenting how I go... it means I can hold myself accountable now since I have told you all about this.

My list honestly could have continued such as "yet to finish unpacking", "yet to manage that room makeover" and so on. I just decided to choose things that will either improve my life, bring me joy or are somewhat achievable for this year.... and if I win the lotto that is a bonus!

Russ asked me what I have been writing/working on the past couple of days, he then rattled off a list of 18 things he *felt* I should do instead which all involved him and were very much Russ focussed or specific. I laughed and said, your list kind of defeats the purpose of several things on my list like taking time for me and saying no and putting me first.

To be fair, his list was most of what I do anyway which was:
1. give Russ head scratches
2. Give him foot rubs and massages
3. Run a bubble bath for Russ
4. To go fishing
5. To go camping
6. To get roof racks and go canoeing
and so on..... but I was kind of proud that he is taking initiative when it comes to his own self care and recognising what he needs to do for his own mental health too.


One of the best moments of last year, my first tattoo drawn by Jubly-Umph

Here's hoping 2018 is a good year and that I can do some of these things if not all. Despite spending over 80% of the year in bed last year, the times I did bucket list stuff or was out and about are some of my most cherished memories looking back, those memories I remember on my bad days.

I wish you a HNY2018 and wishing you health, love, success, happiness and clarity this year.

Thank you for reading, feel free to share something you hope to do this year in the comments below:

Posted by: Talya AT 11:23 am   |  Permalink   |  0 Comments  |  Email
Sunday, August 13 2017

It is hard to believe that it is almost 12 months since we have moved into our new house! 


Top = today a year ago; bottom = recent picture before the birds of paradise
were planted under the window shown. Behind the fence is my koi pond!

I have been so busy trying to live and love life, plus enjoying the good days, that we haven't yet completed unpacking our house and we have so much left to do. This has had me feeling rather disappointed in myself as I was really hoping to have had the house set up and finished by now. So while we have nothing planned for the next few months, I really want to focus on finishing the unpacking and working on styling the house.

Having a beautifully styled house that I am proud of is one of the things I wanted to tick off my bucket list!

The first room I want to finish is our master suite (bedroom and ensuite). I spend so much time in my bed, bedroom and ensuite, that for me it is my most used/lived in space. I really wanted the room to make me feel happy, safe, comfortable, relaxed and proud; but more importantly, I want others visiting me to feel the same sense of comfort.

I had hoped by now to be able to have afforded a full room makeover, or to be on our feet financially for that matter. We have been adding pieces to the room as our budget has allowed us over the last year, but we still have a way to go. I love a good bargain and hunting for things
on sale. I also like to use my phone or laptop to browse and compare different products/prices online. We don't have a lot of money so I need to ensure that our money is well spent.

Russ thought it would be a good idea to perhaps write a blog post as a wishlist of what we want to achieve so that in a way we can hold ourselves accountable for ticking off this goal of finishing the house, and especially our room.
 
So, this is the accountability post for completing my master bedroom and my wish list for the tropical styled things I want in it.

I promise to do an 'after' or finished/completed type post, otherwise I will share the gradual progress on social media until then!

With spending so much of my time in bed, or unable to get out to shop in person, a lot of that time is spent just browsing sites to get a clearer picture of styling/product ideas. It is always nice when companies have a good online store with stock updates that are timely and reliable. If they have social media too you can see how other customers are using their products to style and get ideas from actual users of the products. I know I browse through Fantastic Furniture and Pillow Talk online all the time (as they are two stores close to where I live), always keeping an eye out for sales or new stock. I have a few other sites that I regularly do the rounds to check for the latest products, styling ideas or latest sales (I wish the reject shop had an online store), it really does help to pass the time when you are otherwise stuck in bed.

Another way to pass the time and find inspiration is Pinterest! I only hope I can create and style a Pinterest or Instagram worthy house on a budget!

Why tropical?
I wanted to choose a tropical styling for my room as it could be a way of adding my favourite things: timber, cool white, actual greenery and more vibrant colours without these elements being too overpowering or clashing with each other. I love birds of paradise and grew up with a frangipani themed room, so tropical has always been rooted in my core. We have birds of paradise in one of our bedroom windows as well as a frangipani tree in the garden we can access via our master ensuite. A tropical room has always been a dream of mine!

Quilt:
I really wanted a quilt that was bright, fun and certain to help lift my spirits on days where I'm struggling. I wanted it to be a way to motivate me each day - 12 months on and this quilt still does all that.... I purchased the quilt from Pillow Talk (it is now unavailable) before we moved house, along with the matching print on the wall (see below). I used these two items to start my tropical themed room. I know it isn't traditionally tropical but it is as I say "contemporary tropical" or that's how I've interpreted it. The quilt means I can add pops of colours into the room without seeming untethered to the core concept.

 
My beautiful, fun, bright and happy quilt from Pillow Talk & my bed

I am hoping the quilt isn't the reason the styling of the room falls apart, so I am hoping I can make it work to pull it off! I really love this quilt especially as on the reverse side it has this nice aqua colour + it matches with my purple (fave colour) sheets, so not sure if I want to part with it. However, if necessary to better the room then I might, but it makes me feel so happy and that is my priority!

Were I to change quilt covers if I felt it (the above quilt) really wasn't a fit, I have found some others from Pillow Talk and Spotlight that I have pictured below. It is so hard to choose what one I like the most, so these are my top 10! Pics to the left are from Pillow talk and pics to the right are from spotlight respectively.


Again not sponsored, these are just my favourite choices.

Bed:
I absolutely love my bed (pictured above)!

We purchased it back in 2012 from Beds R'Us and it was looking amazing until Dusty recently decided it was in fact his clawing post (I cried, it was heartbreaking to see/hear). I had thought about upgrading our bed but my heart is too set on it. It is a king size; it is leather which is easy to clean; it is white which means ANY quilt cover looks great and that it can be suited to any theme; it is the right height for me and doesn't hurt to get in and out of like our timber bed before; and besides, it looks so elegant too!

I know Russ has thought about upgrading our king bed maybe after I die, he feels it is too pretty for a guy and too hard to keep clean because it is white, not that he wants to remove my existence from our home- just he might feel like a change, who knows? If he/we did upgrade this is one that he has his heart set on. 

I know he likes timber beds a lot (we have 2 timber beds in the spare rooms, one was his from when he was a bachelor up until we upgraded to our white bed). We were looking around Coffs recently at the different options of tropical-esque furniture and he decided he really likes the 'Toronto King Bed' from Fantastic Furniture


Toronto King Bed plus bedroom package suite from Fantastic Furniture

Something to note is it is made from Acacia wood sourced from sustainably grown plantations (which is a tick from us as we try to be environmentally conscious), but the beauty of this timber is that it would beautifully match a tropical themed room! It is a bargain at $799 with 6 years warranty too (I think Russ is all for extending our warranties from his job as a salesman), as opposed to the $3500 we paid for our current bed, so if we/he upgraded it is a nice and affordable option indeed. Felt pretty solid too.

TV Stand:
Russ had said 11 months ago that he would organise some mates to come help him mount the TV in our bedroom, I hate being a nagging wife, but sometimes nothing would get done if I didn't keep asking. Most of the time I think he isn't listening but then some days he surprises me.... like last week. 

I have been wanting the TV set up in our room so that I could watch Netflix, a movie or catch up on missed TV shows. I'm not well enough to sit out of bed for long most days, so having the TV in the room would help. I am struggling typing or holding my phone and iPad the last few months, the nerve damage from chemo and the tumours are making it painful to touch things. I try to use my iPad but it is frustrating sometimes at how small the screen is or at the lack of sound (remembering I am deaf in one ear) so it makes sense to set up the TV where I can see it comfortably.

So Russ one afternoon last week told me to stay in the lounge room as he had a surprise planned... surprise (see picture below)! He had set the TV up on top of some cheap/flimsy bookshelf from the shed. Doofus! I loved the sentiment, but I am so worried as Dusty is a climber who likes jumping on shelves. But it has been great the past week enjoying TV from the comforts of my own bed!

We have been looking into options to put the TV on. It needs to be at a height of 900mm or higher due to laying in bed and not having a clear view if any lower.

So we have found two options: We thought that a chest of drawers would give the best height plus allow for additional storage. Russ wants the tall 4 drawer as it is 150mm taller than our current set up, but aesthetically I think the 6 draw would look and fit the space better - though it is 100mm less (but TV is awkwardly watchable). The two we like are in the Toronto range from Fantastic Furniture and there is only a $100 price difference. I can't decide, but once we do we will enquire into layby options to pay it off over a set period which makes it more affordable. I know $599 or $699 respectively might not seem like a lot - but it is for us when there isn't a lot in the bank.

Chair:
I always felt awkward on days where I was bed ridden and loved ones or palliative care nurses were visiting me. They were always either standing around or sitting on the bed next to me. A friend flew up from Sydney for my birthday and while she was here I was in bed with so much pain that I was unable to get up. I ended up having to text her to say "help yourself to the kitchen" so she came in and she layed herself down beside me, we just chatted for hours (it reminded me of sleepovers from the good ol' days). But I knew we needed to organise a chair sooner rather than later. So a chair was top priroty on our list of room additions.

We needed to get a cupboard for the hallway (can never have enough storage) and Super Amart had a 'buy one get 2nd item half price', so we only paid $225 for the armchair (it all went on our G.E. interest free card)! It is the 'James' and is the same as the lounges in the living room and it is wide enough so I can sit in it comfortably - if I want to sit and read, it has big arms and is really spacious. Russ often sits there reading a book while I am sleeping, especially on my bad days, so that he can watch over me and feel he is close by. Dusty also has claimed the chair as his, so just like every other part of the house this was business-as- usual.


As a family we all love this chair!

The chair for us was a must have for the future too. There will come a point when I am declining in my health and I want people to visit me and be comfortable. Russ tells me that it is 'typical Talya behaviour - always thinking of others needs', but all I want is for people to want to visit. It is a fear that I will be dying and be alone and I don't want to die not knowing that I am loved. So this chair is important and it gets used often.

Bedside tables:
I currently have 2 x white wooden bedsides I got from Fantastic Furniture way back in 2011 that still look in new condition. I like that these are timeless and can go with any trend/style and are sturdy. With a big cupboard space I have put baskets in there filled with medications and syringe safety bins for my Clexane injections. So keeping these and using them will save on costs, which is always nice when you're styling a room on a budget.

Wall Decor:
I have one framed print of a birds of paradise that matches the quilt (pictured below), but with so many walls still bare in my room it can be mistaken as being clinical. I want to get some wooden shelving, cubes or hexagons to make a wall feature which doubles as storage to have some plants around the room and to hold other little nick-nacks.


Birds of Paradise framed print from pillow talk

When we were in Fantastic Furniture recently I stumbled across this flamingo canvas artwork (below) that has all the colours of my quilt and is keeping in with the contemporary tropical theme, Russ really liked it too, so we are hoping to get it when we can afford it. It wasn't much, around $49 from memory.

I also enlisted the help of Foote and Flame to cut out some bamboo shapes of different tropical leaves so that I can hang these around my room and make an art piece from it. I also found some cheap tropical leaves in Kmart for $3 in various sizes and styles too. I know pillow talk have some too. I am hoping on the next day Russ has off to look at placement of the wooden and artificial leaves. 

Nick-nacks:
I have been keeping an eye out over the last year for different tropical themed pieces or even nice wooden decor, and trying to nab a good bargain. I have my eye on some timber framed artwork, some timber pineapple frames and other odds and ends like fake succulents. I really want to have some fake plants around the room to fill the spaces (My thumbs aren't green and Russ is not always home). 

I know we are trying to fit a lot into such a small space and I do hope that in the end it all looks as homey and relaxing as it does in my head. I am hoping now that I have written this that it holds Russ and I accountable for getting our house sorted. I know 12 months ago I didn't think I would still be here today and I know the outlook isn't too great for the next year, but I just really want to feel calm knowing my house is in order.... literally and figuratively! I want to not feel anxious over if I have done enough or if people are judging me.

I am really wanting my room to be my tropical escape as I won't have the ability to travel there myself I want to bring it to me.

I am also not an interior designer or stylist, so I don't know if the mood board I have in my noggin' is going to work, I will just have to see won't I!

If you know of any tropical themed wares over the coming weeks and months feel free to let me know so I can check them out. I am really wanting to have my room finished by Christmas/New Year at the latest. Plenty of time I know, but if the last 12 months have taught me anything it is that Russ is a snail (when it comes to getting things done) and time certainly does flies by!

So tell me, do you have a themed/styled room or house? Which room of your house is your favourite?
Comment below or join the conversation on Instagram or Facebook search @feelingostomistic or twitter @feel_ostomistic

Posted by: Talya AT 08:15 am   |  Permalink   |  0 Comments  |  Email
Thursday, July 06 2017
I know I am pretty slack when it comes to updating posts on my blog the last few months, I have been having fun microblogging over at Facebook and Instagram as it has been more convenient to do updates than to do a blog post due to my health (and sleeping 20 hours most days). If you're interested in knowing or understanding more about what goes into a single blog post and why it can take hours to do one post, the wonderful Micheala from Not Another Slippery Dip recently shared an insightful post which you can read by clicking here!

Sometimes ​the internet can be a beautiful and magical place,
I know I have seen the impact and difference that social media and the internet has made to my own life and those around me, but to see complete strangers come together on several occasions this past year to help us is truly heart warming. People whom I only know from their online presence and otherwise would not have met them, have became good friends to me and have helped to create what has been the most amazing 6 months filled with memories and moments I cherish and I hope that they will too for years to come..... this post is just one of those magical moments created!

Background:

So all the way back in March (I told you I've been slack with my posts) was Russ The Ostomistic Husband's 37th birthday! What eventuated from me feeling guilty that I had ruined his birthday actually became one of the most beautiful gestures I have seen from people from all over the world!

On that same day I was being admitted to hospital for a bit of a respite break and to get my pain under control, it had been weeks since I had felt some relief.

Russ had to work that day, so it was a pretty early start for both of us as we packed my bags and Russ got ready for work and dropped me off to the hospital before he headed to work. Thankfully, my room was ready and available (surprised as it was 7.30am) and he helped me to get settled before he left.

But I felt immense guilt, it was his birthday... his day to be spoiled and showered with love. After all he makes me feel loved everyday and especially made sure I knew how much I was loved by others with the gofundme page he set up for my garden, so I wanted him to know just how many people care about him too.  


Russ visiting me in hospital with our furbaby Dusty! High-5!

What came next:

After chatting with my friend Kylie from Kidgredients in the lead up to his birthday, she suggested putting a call out on social media and asking people to write "happy birthday Russ from __insert location here__" and then take a photo of that piece of paper with a little bit of the background.

I went out to dinner with Russ the night before I went into hospital as we both had a free steak from Hogs Breath as our birthday steaks (a part of the frequent diners club you get a steak during your birthday month), so while Russ was at the toilet I took the chance to write my birthday message on a napkin and ran outside to capture it. In the background above is the iconic whale fountain.

What came next from my post was unexepected!

I was blown away by the response and all the thought and love that was being sent my way.

I even felt like I had travelled the world in one whole day, and seeing all the locations - my heart was heavy with love and excitement knowing how happy this made me feel- I knew Russ would feel the same way!

So once all the images were received (there were hundreds!) I then sent them over to Kylie who then turned the collection of images into a video slideshow!!

You can see the video slideshow here!

Sadly, not all could be fitted on the slideshow and if yours didn't appear please don't fret as Russ sat there individually looking at them on my phone for the next hour, so it wasn't forgotten or unseen and he appreciated it so much.

So 5pm came around and shortly after Russ arrived at my hospital room. I then filmed him and his reaction on facebook live, which you can watch below.


Russ loved the beatiful gesture and seeing all the different locations

Russ' response:

Russ sat there re-watching the slideshow a few times and even sat there for a long time scrolling through all the photos. If you couldn't tell from the video above he was in tears. The love he felt and knowing that so many people cared enough to take time out of their busy lives to do this, really meant so much to him.

Russ is one of those amazing guys who does so much for others without hesitation or needing to be asked and he doesn't ask for anything in return. He is the most loving, caring, kind and compassionate person I know: and he deserves to be recognised and rewarded, even if it was just for one day - his birthday - it just meant so much to him.

It is hard most days just knowing how tiring it is for Russ to work full-time and be my carer too, as well as dealing with the rollercoaster ride that is my cancer journey. Some days he is surprisingly strong, but other days he struggles and looks exhausting... it is hard seeing how taxing all this is on him, so I just really wanted him to know how loved and special he is.

I am so grateful to Russ and for everything he does, he is one amazing guy!


Russ is known for his background antics in our photos - here he is licking my hair, don't ask!

Thank you:

I just wanted to say a special thank you again to everyone who made this happen and a special thanks to Kylie from Kidgredients for all the time and love she put into the slideshow for us. Kylie has some delicious recipes on her site, especially for kids and lunchbox foods, even delicious snacks that are easy to make. Be sure to pop by her site - you won't be disapointed!

Kylie, thank you again for this special memory Russ will never forget, and most of all thank you for being one heck of a wonderful woman and friend. You helped me to create something truly magical. 

 

Posted by: Talya AT 08:18 pm   |  Permalink   |  2 Comments  |  Email
Saturday, August 29 2015

When it comes to gift giving and finding the perfect personalised gifts, I seem to have a nack for finding those perfect gifts that will have people talking about, especially if there is a story behind receiving the gift.

Originally, I was planning this post to promote in the lead up to Father's day... but as this is now only a week away I realise it could be best represented as a general gift guide for Christmas (which someone reminded me yesterday was only 119 days to go), for a birthday coming up or for Father's day whether it was a belated 2015 gift or planning ahead for 2016.

Either way, I have sourced some pretty awesome gifts that I know any dad or husband would love and appreciate.

BEST OF ALL these are made here in Australia by small businesses and some are even handcrafted/handmade. I love supporting the little guys in business, who are working hard to support their families and helping us all to add something unique to our lives.

Here is my list of 10 personalised gift ideas your dad or husband would love!

#1. Personalised Chopping Boards | Miss Bold Design $35 + shipping
We all know dad's love a good BBQ and some of my fondest memories of my dad and growing up involved his legendary barbies, so if your dad (like mine) loves to cook or put on a good BBQ then spoil him with his very own chopping board.

I love the boards created by MissBold Design, and there is a range of designs to suit each dad's personality. A sure way to make any dad, husband or even your pop feel special!

Miss Bold Design also has a range of other boards perfect gifts for your mum, nan, friend, or as a wedding gift personalised with their name and the date of their wedding.

Current turnaround: Please note that personalised boards will be created after September 12th, 2015

 


 


#2. Prints for Dad, Pop, Grandpa | Ollie's Room from $15 + shipping

The range of Quote/name prints available at Ollie's Room are a perfect gift to not only brighten up a room, but pop it in a fram and you have a special keepsake!

❖ Each print can be personalised with a name or custom writing* and can be personalised with 2 colours.
❖ The name 'Dad' can be changed with any name you prefer
❖ Professionally printed on 260gsm weight archival paper which should last around 30 years

Available in the following Sizes:
❖ 20.32cm x 25.4cm (8"x10") ❖ A4 Size - 21.0cm x 29.7cm (8.3" x 11.7")
❖ A3 Size - 29.7cm x 42.0cm  (11.7" x 16.5") ❖ A2 Size -  42cm x 59.4cm  ( 16.5" x 23.4") 
Frame not included, you are purchasing the print only. *A fee may apply.

Turnaround: As each print is individually personalised and professionally printed by our printing company, delivery times to you can take 2-3 weeks (approximately).  If you wish to purchase express postage. Please contact us before ordering.

 

PLUS a FREE printable for dad/grandpa thanks to Ollie's Room!
Click here to see the
FREE printables

#3. Personalised Man Stands | Blacklist Prints $38 + shipping

The Man Stand is the perfect gift for any guy who needs a place to store those things he only wears when going out. The Man Stand doubles as a iPhone or iPad dock and will keep all his things ready to grab when walking out the door.

❖ Store (& Charge) an iPhone or iPad.
❖ Store a wallet & Watch
❖ Hook for Keys and a Slot for Pen
❖ Cut out for coins or wedding ring.

The Stand is adjustable and can be set at different heights for reading or watching movies. The Stand also folds flat so he can take it away on holidays or business trips.

Excludes accessories shown in picture for demo only, the demo images show Non-Personalised Man Stands. Non-Personalied Man Stands are $33 + shipping. 

Turnaround: Include a personalised message on your Man Stand, see their Fb page for examples. Please allow 7-10 days for personalised products.

 

#4. Personalised Gifts for Dad | Zelsk from $8.50 + shipping

If you've got some beautiful photos of your children and want to create the ultimate personalised and keepsake gift, then look no further, as I have found the solution... Zelsk! Based in Brisbane they ship all over Australia.

Some of their unique gifts pictured include (and not limited to):
❖ Funny/Punny wine labels for dad starting at $8.50 (Wine bottle not included)
❖ A4 120 piece puzzle of 6 of your images $21.50
❖ MDF glossy puzzle of your image $28

Not pictured are:
❖ Personalised Dad's swear jar ($ to be confirmed)
❖ Set of wooden Photo coasters ($ TBC)
❖ Personalised photo mugs ($ TBC)
❖ Personalised photo clocks ($ TBC)

Turnaround: Orders and the online store is closed until 7th September 2015, but like their fb page to be kept up to date when the store re-opens and their exciting new rebrand too.

 

#5. Personalised Heat Packs | Lil' Sunshine Collections $35 + FREE shipping

Heat packs are a perfect gift for Dad, Grandpa or your husband. Created in a range of designs (pictured). Available in one size –  approximately 28x19cm!

Personalise it on the front with any name (eg. Dad, Grandpa, Uncle, Poppy, etc) you’d like in and as these are printed on both sides and the pattern wrapping seamlessly all the way around, you can add a personal message on the back with who the heat pack is from!

The heat bag is made entirely of 100% cotton. Filled with raw long grain rice, and organically dried lavender. A beautiful, soothing & divine scent to smell, as well as staying warmer for much longer.

Easy to use and quick to heat up! Perfect for aches, even lovely to pop into bed to take off the chill. Lavender is calming so will enhance a great nights sleep. Or to chill – Put in a small plastic bag & pop into the freezer. It won’t freeze like a block of ice, instead the grains of rice become super cold & very pliable.

Turnaround: As these are all individual and personalised, they are made to order, please allow approximately 3-4 weeks from the date of order for delivery.

The 10 most awesome personalised gift ideas for Dad continues after this image.


#6. Personalised Wrapping Paper | Love JK  from $7.95 + shipping
We all know how much love and precision goes into wrapping each present. What if I told you that you could have PERSONALISED wrapping paper with YOUR OWN PHOTOS and it is conveniently shipped the next business day from Melbourne! How good does that sound!

Give your gift the WOW factor by ordering your very own wrapping paper which comes in a range of sizes starting at 43cm x 1m and ranging to 43cm x 5m lengths of paper.

Some product information at a glance (see their website for more detail):
Printed on 88gsm high quality photo matte paper
Paper is bright white in colour, and photos print beautifully
Printed edge to edge (Borderless)
Rolls are shipped in a sturdy protective mailing tube and protected with tissue paper

Current turnaround: Orders are shipped next business day excluding Australian and Vic Public Holidays.

 

 

#7. Personalised Beer Mugs | Personalised Favours from $18.50 + shipping

Show Dad how much you care on Father’s Day, his birthday or Christmas with a laser-engraved 500ml Beer Mug! Have his name and a special message engraved for a personal gift your Dad will love and no doubt cherish.

Each Beer Mug or Beer Stein is professionally laser engraved with your selected artwork or custom image. Best of all, all artwork is completed free of charge with unlimited revisions!

What makes this the perfect gift for your dad, is that it is practical but also more memorable than a tie or gift card... it is a gift he can cherish and show off for years to come.

Besides, I am sure it will earn you the Child of the year award too, not that it is a competition or anything with your siblings (but if you're a competitive bunch, this is a must).

Turnaround: Your gift will be on its way to you in only 5-10 working days, even faster if it is urgent.




#8. Wooden Dad Wall Hanging| Bubs and Beans $51.95 + shipping
A great gift for Dad, whether its Christmas, Fathers Day or Birthday, or just because he truly is the 'Best Dad'!

This gorgeous wooden wall hanging is made from bamboo and is finished with a light natural wax to enhance the natural colour and grains of the bamboo. This plaque measures 19cm x 23cm and is 2.5mm thick. It also comes with natural twine so is ready to hang.

Please note that as Bamboo is a natural product, the colour and grain may vary slightly from the images shown here. 

This beautiful wall hanging is designed and made in Australia.

Current turnaround: This will be shipped approx. 1-2 weeks from the time of order

 



 

#9. Personalised Guitar Pick Keyring | LOVEnCHERISH from $40 + shipping

Does an important man in your life love playing the guitar? If so this personalised metal guitar pick is not only the perfect gift but a unique keepsake as well.

Available in your choice of:
❖ Sterling Silver
❖ Brass
❖ Copper
❖ Aluminium

If you're looking for the pick on it's own and not on the keyring, LOVEnCherish have a range of metal picks with and without key fobs. Pricing varies on design, but a sentimental gift that will be loved and cherished over the years to come.

Each pick can be personalised too with a name or date.

Turnaround: Orders are processed in order of date of payment received.  Regular custom orders take up to 2-3 weeks to be made and are then posted out via registered post (Australia only).

 

#10. Custom Torch Light Stubby Coolers | Kool4U Stubby Coolers $TBC
Your dad or husband will be the talk of the next party or social event with these cool Custom Torch Light Stubby Coolers from Kool4U!

Not only is this a stubby, but it is also a torchlight and illuminates your beverage into cool colours. These are the coolest stubbies around.

If you're after a custom printed design they can help you with that too! Oh and if you're not after the torchlight stubbies but a custom printed normal stubby, this can be arranged too.

Each stubby cooler is made in Australia using high quality neoprene (wet suit material) to keep your drink staying cooler and fresher for longer. Also made with a double stitch and rubber base.

P.S they also make custom printed Bar runners! 

Current turnaround: Please note that orders take approx 7-10 working days to complete + shipping timeframes, see their website for more information!

I hope you've enjoyed finding some new products and businesses to browse, I know I already have some of these gifts in mind for the important men (my pop, uncles, brothers, and of course my hubby) in my life.

The main drive behind this post was a rather personal one. In the lead up to Father's Day this year, I (like every year since my dad passed away) felt a bit sad. But this year I decided I would do something different and I decided I would go searching for items I would have bought for my dad if he were still with us; and with those products and businesses I found, I would then pay it forward by doing a little gift guide for dad and promoting these businesses.

Disclaimer: The businesses I featured above were businesses I have come across through my own findings and thought they were pretty awesome not to share. I simply wanted to create a gift guide to help with buying gifts for your husband, dad or grandfather (even your brother too).
 

 

 

 

 

 
Posted by: Talya AT 01:34 am   |  Permalink   |  1 Comment  |  Email
Tuesday, July 07 2015

 

We are so lucky here in Coffs Harbour that there is an abundance of restaurants and cafe's open early in the morning right through until after lunch and often serving all-day-breakfast, and then there is almost as many places open serving dinner. There is a lot of variety to choose on depending on what it is that you like to eat and your budget. We also have some very beautiful surrounding towns not too far from Coffs and have some great shopping and local attractions.

The 'Clog Barn' offers the most delicious pancake stack for approx. $13, while the Twisted Sisters Cafe at the Jetty has an area for the kids to play while you catch up with friends over a well deserved coffee and cake. The food is pretty great too and they have a range of locally made products available to purchase as well, locals supporting locals is great!

Have you ever been on holidays and you actually WANTED to cook? Well... Me neither (lol)

I know how frustrating it is though, when you want something yummy and fulfilling for dinner, are on holidays and you have no idea on the best places to eat OR the places that offer GREAT meals at affordable budget friendly prices.

That's why I thought that I would do this post, and help share my part of Australia as a local with those who might be on holidays and visiting Coffs Harbour and the Coffs Coast and/if you are a local who is wanting to know where they can dine for under $11!

Here is my list of 11 places to eat for under $11.

Breakfast with a view
The Park Beach Surf Club is right on the beach, and you can enjoy $10 breakfasts 7 days a week overlooking the beautiful beaches and enjoy the views of the surrounding landscape. 

Plenty of parking available, and only a stones throw from the beach to go on a stroll after Breakfast.
Or if you're a dare devil, why don't you skydive onto the beach in front of the surf club.



Or if you would enjoy eating breakfast looking out over beautiful Coffs Creek at the fish and mangroves, my personal favourite breakfast spot is Mangrove Jacks with breakfast options starting from a low $4.50 for Raison or Cinnamon Toast with meal options ranging to $14.
I just love the peace and trainquility Mangrove Jack's offers.

If you're in Sawtell, or wanting to go and have breakfast somewhere, take the drive out there. Only a short drive from Coffs and some of the most beautiful beaches and views from the headlands and lookouts. While you're there stop by the Wholly Cow cafe and take advantage of the awesome $10 bacon + egg burger and coffee deal. Friendly staff and I just love the vibe you get when you walk through the doors.

Lunch for under $11

Hogs Breath Cafe $9.90 lunches available Monday-Friday, and these are pretty big meals! My husband loves the smoked BBQ beef wrap which comes with the delicious curly fries, while I like the grilled chicken and ranch burger with curly fries.

But they also have fish and chips, nachos, crispy chicken ceaser wrap and mexican beef wrap on offer.
Also open for dinner, and kids can eat free (check the store for terms and conditions of use).


The C.ex Club in the heart of Coffs Harbour CBD offer a range of $9.90* meals over lunchtime during the week (*$10.90 for non members) and include a selection of 7 mains and 4 desserts, with desserts being an additional 50c!!

These meals are also available over the weekend, but the pricing is different.

The club is quite large and also has a kids club for the kids while you have a drink after lunch, with there also being a 'glee club' each school holidays.
 

This would be my favourite Chinese place to go to for lunch or dinner in Coffs, and they have beautiful lunchtime specials for just $9.95 including fried rice or crispy noodles. Located in Park Ave across from Woolworths.
                                                They also offer dinner delivery for a very small fee.


The Hoey Moey is located down alongside of the beautiful Park Beach, in Coffs Harbour and is home of the $7.50 feeds available at lunch and dinner (a different option each night).
Monday night is Barrumundi; Tuesday is Lamb Cutlets night; Wednesday is Rump night; Thursday is Chicken Parmi night; Friday is Chicken snitzel; Saturday is lamb cutlets and Sunday is Rump steak!

Every Sunday there is also Kids Club Crab day with kids eating FREE from 12-2PM and live crab racing from 12.30pm. There is also kids club as well on a Sunday.

 

There is this quaint and homely little cafe about 20-30mins drive from Coffs Harbour situated in the village of Bellingen or as the locals know it as 'Bello'. The Black Bear Cafe situated on Church St, is home to the $11 Friday Pieday specials where you'll enjoy a locally baked pie, salad and a tea or coffee. What a bargain at $11!

 


Dinner for the family under $11

The Plantation Hotel, on the highway in the heart of Coffs would be our regular place to eat with their $8.50 lunches and dinners, and it is such a good atmosphere with Tuesday nights being family nights and entertainment for the kids, and the kids can even make their own pizzas! I love their chunky battered fries they serve too.

Monday nights they have trivia, Tuesday they have 30 of these huge meat raffles, Monday and Wednesday nights is buy any 2 meals from the A La Carte menu and only pay for the more expensive meal! 
Tuesday nights, kid's can also eat FREE*! *Conditions apply, see their website for more information.


The Seaview Tavern is located up on the hill in River St Woolgoolga, and is a great place for the whole family with plenty of comfortable outdoor lounges and seating, as well as on Sunday's there is things to do for the family.

At the moment there is $7.50 lunch and dinners on offer, including chicken snitzel, roast dinners, steaks and more! There is also a courtesy bus you can take advantage of.

Every Sunday kids can eat FREE* with every full Adult meal purchased at Lunch or Dinner.

 

There is this great and unique venue in Coffs down on the Jetty strip called element bar created within a modern/rustic/urban industrial space and is the place to be. With not only a great selection of food at a great price, they also have a range of drinks and cocktails to suit every preference along with amazing LIVE music.

Best of all, they are opened until late of a night.

On Tuesday nights they have a 'wings, rings and dogs night' which includes a 1KG bucket of chicken wings for $10 in honey soy chicken, buffalo style or ghost peper. Along with a bowl of crispy onion rings for $5 and an American style hot dog for $7. It is the funkiest place in Coffs. Love the atmosphere and vibe!

While there are a lot more restaurants and cafes in the area than the 11 places I mentioned, this is a list of my top 11 choices for eating out in under $11, and if you have your own recommendations within the local area, please feel free to comment these below. 

I feel blessed to live in such a beautiful area of Australia, and I hope that you find this guide to affordable places to eat while on holidays useful. Be sure to stop by the Solitary Islands Aquarium, and the Dolphin Marine Magic and get a kiss off of a Dolphin!

I highly urge you to head to the Woolgoolga headland during winter and see how many whales you can spot as they migrate north.

It won't take you long to fall in love with the Coffs Coast!

 

 
Posted by: Talya AT 02:08 am   |  Permalink   |  Email
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~  Living with Familial Adenomatous Polyposis - Effects of FAP  ~

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Talya Goding - Feeling Ostomistic   talya@feelingostomistic.com.au  |  0447 426 860

Thank you for stopping by Feeling Ostomistic. It has taken a lot of courage to share my story and I ask that you show me and my site/blog respect and courtesy. Views expressed in this blog are my own and I am not a nurse or a doctor. If you need medical advice please seek your medical practitioner.

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